Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize