I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize