brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
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