just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
