Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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