And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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