So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Randomize
