This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I cut my penus on the lid.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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