whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
