Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
