hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
