erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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