I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Randomize