"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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