We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
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