Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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