i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
