I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
