if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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