I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
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