Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
