you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
