Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
