We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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