he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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