How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
