nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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