Having a random hookup so left but love u
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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