There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Randomize
