I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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