That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
so much tequila, so little girl.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
