You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Randomize
