Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
