The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
