Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
