no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
