Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
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