She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
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