summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Randomize
