i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
