found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize