i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
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