im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
