i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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