it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
