Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
