well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
