if you like me you must not know who I am
It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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