If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
