They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
What happened to fro yo and sex?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Randomize
